Highlights From My Life
- Born with a purse in one hand and lipstick in the other (still there today though the purse is
more like a suitcase and the lipstick is bright pink)
- 1962 - First story written in 2nd grade using spelling words; subject – mice who drink too
much and party all night long: teachers suggest counseling
- 1965 – anxious to ‘develop’ so can purchase first bra (desperately need a support system)
- 1972 - Took twelve English / Literature courses in senior year of high school ; counseling
offered
- 1970’s - Married; gave birth to three children; gained much material for future use; sought
counseling (need a good support system and need it NOW!)
- 1973 - Breast size increased from 34b to 42DD during 1st pregnancy. Doctor orders me
into a breast binder. (I thought torture went out with the Middle Ages. See 1965 – ‘be careful
what you wish for’)
- 1970's - 1980's - Siblings married; more relatives = more material for stories; suggested
some of them seek counseling
- 1980’s – seek employment with pay and benefits to support my many addictions
/obsessions & neuroses
- 1990’s – Exploding under wire bra phase begins (my support system begins to fail)
- 1992 - Diagnosed with lupus; choice of giving in or using humor to survive; I’m still here
- 1992 - Best friend went to treatment center; desperately needed humor to keep her spirits
up; sent stories of sock eating vacuum cleaners, petrified pets, long-lost vegetables; friend
survived – writing now a part of everyday life
- 1993 - Took first courses in creative writing ; invited by teacher to be Treasurer of local
writing group due to my skills in this area (Note: not invited to write with or for the group)
- 1995 - Was nicknamed Lucy after Lucy Van Pelt (the nickel therapist) from Charles Schultz’
Peanuts character
- 1995 - Began writing seriously – OOPS!! Began writing humor on a regular basis
- 1996 - Developed strange obsession with getting up at 6 a.m. every other Saturday to visit
with nail technician and get pedicure and manicure (OH, the price of beauty is high; see
1980 and reference to obsessions / addictions)
- 2002 – Bras still causing problems – now with the heightened security at airports (more
trouble with the support system)
- 2003 – told by eminent Physician that all of my problems could be cured by losing weight
and purchasing a new bra (suggested he and his staff seek counseling)
- 2003 - Joined the local Footprints group to write my life story as a legacy for my children
(that’s all they’ll get; I spent their inheritance on counseling and bras)
- 2005 years old I found out by taking Turkish lessons that I don’t translate well and am
incomplete and dead (being dead has its advantages – no more counseling or bras)
- 2008 - Bras are still a very big part of my life. I now own approximately 3 more than the ages
of my children combined. None of them are sexy. None of them are from Victoria's Secrets.
And none of them fit. I have begun taking Arabic lessons so I can communicate with my
Egyptian friends - though I'm not sure how that will help with the current bra situation.
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